Some things might not be meant to be....I need to keep it pushin

So, whats really sad--- is that nobody actually reads this--other than my 2 followers-- not even my family.

AND

that I think im destined to be alone. Not having an actual relationship in 6 years is NOT a phase-- its a reality--and should be a sign to myself--however I have chosen to ignore the facts and place my faith in the "what if".

I am trying more and more each day to be ok with this reality. Girlfriends that mean well-- are NOT making the situation any better. Their eternal springs of hope-- dont help. They just place me back in the cycle that leads to disappointment.

Here are the facts-- and I am prepared to face and accept them, even if I dont want to. so yeah..

I just think that this whole, "the right person is out there" and "you WILL meet him"-- when NOTHING positive has happened in 6 years-- cant be a good sign or a healthy way to think about this. I know that they want to bring postitivity to my life-- but the SITUATION speaks for itself. I might not be meant for anyone on this earth. I might be meant for solitude and something other than being in a relationship and being able to build and share my life with a significant other. This hopeless romantic is just that-- HOPELESS! And to repeatedly tell me something that is alternative to what is FACTUAL and what LIFE PATTERN has arisen-- I know is meant well-- but in MY REALITY is just mean! It gives me hope-- which ultimately leads to disappointment and shattered dreams once again. No matter what I WANT-- it might not be what I get. So....

Im trying-- to be a big girl about this--to face the facts and reality. To look at my hopes in the face and say-- "You might not be-- so I need to let you go" Its not that its easy to do this-- its not that I dont shed tears and mourn for the loss of hope-- I do. But in order for me to not dwell on this-- in order for me to move on and not SEE EVERYTHING THAT I WANT NOT HAPPEN TO ME. In order for me to be ok and be happy when others are happy with their others... to not constantly compare myself and come up short because no man cares about me for me--- I need to let this go--

So.....

Here I stand- alone.